Yesterday sucked. I mean really sucked. All the things that happened, by
themselves, might have seemed trivial, but when put together made one horrible
day. Here's what happened:

....First, I was talking to one of the Sales people in Vegas. He handles the Vegas
market for our company. We had hit a snag with his latest deal. Another depart-
ment didn't want to process the numbers he got because it wasn't signed by the
other participating party. However, with most Vegas deals, the party in Vegas
ALWAYS makes sure that we sign it first and THEN they sign it.

I know this. I've been with this company for quite some time.

However, the sales guy was giving me a history of Nevada, as if it was my fault
that the contract was being held up. I pushed the mute button and mumbled to
myself, "Sheesh, you don't have to give me all of Nevada's history..." (He
LOVES to hear himself talk, but he's an okay guy)

...APPARENTLY, I hadn't pushed the right button, and his response was: "Well,
EXCUUUUUSE me! I'm just trying to..." and so on...

My internal response: "Oh, shit..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yeah, so then, five minutes before lunch, my boss comes up to me.

Boss: "Have you gone to lunch yet?"
ME: "Um, I was just about to..."
Boss: "Great, I need you to go to Tom Thumb and pick up a cake for [coworker
who's leaving]"
ME: "Um, ok..."
Boss: "Here's $20. Just go on your lunch and then on your way back you can
have them do the cake. Make it say something like... "May the force be with
you...'Cause you're gonna need it where you're going."
ME: "Riiiiiight....ok"

...So, I call Tom Thumb. I ask: Do I need to call in advance to get a cake with
personalized writing on it?

Tom Thumb Employee: Nah, it's $24.95 in advance, but you can just come in
and order it.

~~ So then I go get more money from Boss and head out. I stop at the store
after lunch to find the selection of cakes to be less than hoped for. I pick out
the only one that has enough room to write ANYTHING on it... and ask them
to write on it: Farewell, [coworker who is leaving]. May the force be with you.

TTE: I don't know if we can put that on there...I don't know if there's enough
room...(With that, she promptly takes the cake and goes into the back store
room)

She comes back out with the cake and it has all the words, I glance at it and
then take it to go pay for it. That's when I realize that I have lost the money
for the cake.

I end up paying for it with my own money and heading back to work. By the
time I get up to my floor and in the door of the department, I realize something
else. The cake says: "Far Well, [coworker who is leaving]. May the force be
with you."

FAR WELL! What the hell is FAR WELL??? I said "Farewell!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Traffic going home sucked. I anticipated this. I figured it would be slow because
water that falls from the scare tends to scare drivers around here. But, it wasn't
raining on the drive home.

Why did traffic suck then? Trafffic was backed up from 635 to almost Royal Lane.
Why? There was an accident. But it wasn't on the road. Oh no. It was in the
parking lot of the mall that is one block from my apartment. It the PARKING LOT.
That means that the only reason we were all going slow is because people had to
slow to satisfy their morbid curiousity!

Mind you, I have nothing against morbid curiousity. I have a fair share of my own.
But when it comes between me getting home and away from the outside world,
that's when I get pissed. And I was pissed. Oh, was I pissed.

Luckily, the ambience at my home and my room mate served to get me laughing
again and today hasn't been so bad. Tomorrow will go by fast because I am
ALWAYS really busy on Fridays...

So...Weekend, here I come.

You know, sometimes...it's not a bad thing to be the Anti-Christ's bitch. I got an 7% raise with my review today. It's effective July 1st. Yay me.

Had to sit through her trying to tell me in a nice way that I had big, distracting tits, but I think it was worth it....

So, this morning I come in and the anti-christ’s door is closed. Everyone assumes she’s not in there. She comes out at about 11:30 to get something to drink and I just happen to see her. I email her and ask her, “Are you hiding from us? We didn’t even know you were in there until you came out to go to the breakroom…”

She replies with, “Yep, I’m doing reviews.”

I respond with, “Ok, so do you want me to hold your calls and is there anyone who you think is important enough to interrupt you?”

She comes back with, “I expected a quick response, but not one so thoughtful….”

And me, well, I’m thinking, Thoughtful, hell! If you’re in there doing MY review, I don’t want you getting interrupted!!!

So, I've come up with a new disease. Let me explain:

Me: Man, I'm starving!
Coworker: Well, aren't you a vampire? Can't you just fly down to (NAME DELETED)'s office and suck some of his blood?
Me: No way! He kisses so much ass, his blood's bound to taste like shit.

...I call it hemo-fecal. It's a terrible disease. One that ruins the lives of everyone around the victim. This is a disease that can be diagnosed quite easily, yet doctors fail to do so. Something has to be done.


Right now, we lack the income and resources to stamp out this dreaded disease, but with YOUR help, something CAN be done. Send in your donations RIGHT AWAY! You can't afford to miss out on this opportunity! And with each donation of $50 or more, you receive this lovely, one-of-a-kind, original, genuine, imitation leather BROWN NOSE!

More reinforcement of how much I don't like the DPD.

I'm not saying I wasn't in the wrong...but do you know how much it sucks to get a speeding ticket, when right before you got pulled over you see at least ONE other driver doing something FAR worse than doing 50 in a 35 zone when there are barely any other cars around? It fucking sucks!

Anywho...That's my rant for the day.

The title of this story is NEVER USE SPRINT PCS:

It started one day in April. The eleventh of the month to be precise. The Gr8Goddess had just made a payment on her cell phone through the Sprint PCS website. She received a confirmation number and went about her regular business.

Cut to --> two to three weeks later.

Gr8Goddess receives a phone call from a Sprint representative. The Rep. is calling to inform her that her account is overdue. They never received payment. They transfer her to the automated system to make a payment. The automated system, after keeping the Gr8Goddess on hold for quite some time, informs her that nothing is owed on her account. She calls customer service back. THIS rep. tells her that looking at the bare bones of her account, her payment was received and she doesn't owe a thing. She asks, "Then, why in the hell are you people calling me!?!?!?!" He replies that he doesn't know and tells her to check with her bank and call back. She does and then she reaches another customer service rep. that tells her that her account is overdue and promptly transfers her BACK TO THE AUTOMATED SYSTEM. (BTW: I HATE Claire, the virtual customer service rep.!) The automated system, when it FINALLY recognizes Gr8's account, informs her that she doesn't owe anything. That her account is paid up. By this time, she is frustrated. She says, "Fuck it."

A couple of days later:

Another customer rep. contacts Gr8 to inform her that her account is overdue. This one tells her that she can make a payment over the phone to a person. Eager to be done with this whole shebang, she grabs her checkbook. However, when the information is put into the system, Sprint can't accept her check. Says it isn't good. So, she decides to try using one of her credit cards. That won't go through either. Gr8, feeling VERY FRUSTRATED at this time, tells the rep. to make a note in her account that she will be going into a Sprint store to pay in cash and she will be cancelling her service because Sprint is consisted solely of morons.

That weekend:

Our heroine goes to the Sprint store only to find a sign on the door informing would be customers and current customers that the system is down and they are unable to accept payments or access anyone's account.

The next week:

ANOTHER CUSTOMER SERVICE REP. gives her a call. Having already seen who it was from on the Caller ID, Gr8 launches into a tirade, informing the rep. that if they look in her account, they should see a note saying that she was going to pay it at a Sprint store in person but she was unable to because their system was down. She tells the rep. that she plans to go again THIS weekend and to stop calling her.

The NEXT weekend:

The Gr8Goddess has a stroke of genius in that she calls the store first to verify that their system is back up. She is told that it is and that she can come in and make a payment. She verifies: "So, I can actually come in and hand somebody cash so you people will get off my back???"

The rep. responds: "Well, no, you can pay it to the machine in the store. If you hand it to a rep. there's a FIVE DOLLAR FEE."

Gr8's response to this is to slam down the phone.

She gets to the store. (Imagine a store the size of an efficiency apartment, crammed to the gills with about fifty customers) She waits in line at the machine to make her payment, where she waits for the next 20-30 minutes. When she gets there she sees a sign that says the "this machine does not make change". Fuck THAT! she thinks to herself and proceeds to pay by check. She takes the
receipt she receives from the machine and gets in line for the customer service desk. She's there for another 30 minutes. When she gets to the desk she tells the rep. that she wants to cancel her service. The rep. tells her: "You need to call customer service to cancel you service. You can use the phone in the back, but it's in use right now. You'll have to wait in line."

Pissed off beyond the point of no return, Gr8Goddess waits. And waits. And waits. And waits. And finally gets so fed up that she elbows her way through the crowded store, spewing curses to make a sailor faint. She slams the door open and stalks out to her car.

AFTER SEVERAL ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES:

She gets home and logs onto the Sprint PCS website. (All this time her account online has shown payment received.) She finally finds an option to cancel her service online. She submits the request with the following message:

This company is the worst company I have ever had the misfortune to deal with. Your customer service is akin to rape. Cancel my service immediately and do NOT contact me via telephone or email to come back or I will find as many disgruntled customers of yours that I can and I will find something to sue you about.

Since then, I have checked my account online once again and found that I still have service though I no longer use my phone. I submitted another request and finally received an email back stating that they have cancelled my service but that it won't take effect until July. I hope they don't expect me to make any more payments. I paid the damn thing off and told them to cancel right after. In fact, in my eyes, they owe me $25 dollars to cover the fee of stopping payment on the original check that this whole mess began with.

Welcome, boys and girls, to the first installment of this mad woman's rants.

Nothing of note has happened today, so I am just going to leave this down for the first post and post something interesting later.

For now, I bid you adieu....or something.