I know this is gonna sound very condescending, but it's what I am thinking at the moment.

I really feel that sometimes, my humor is too high-brow for those around me.

The printer stopped working and IS took it downstairs to work on it. Meanwhile, coworkers who often print and then leave their things on the printer without picking them up continue to print away until I tell them what's going on and then they just complain because IS took the printer.

I told them, "IS is taking the printer downstairs for intensive therapy. They're gonna regress it and tell it that everything that happened is it's mother's fault. After that, it will come back, print a few things and then go on strike because it's overworked and underpaid."

Several looked at me like I was speaking Russian. Others looked at me like I was stupid. I don't care. *I* thought it was funny, dammit.

My roommate just called me to bitch at me for ordering weird things...

Actually, let me clarify that. I am addicted to half.com and I am always getting packages in the mail of stuff that I have ordered. Because he works a night shift, he's actually at home when the apartment office is open, so he will usually go and get my packages from the office while I am at work. Today he picked up two packages from the office.

He called me and said, "As if the apartment office didn't think we were weird before!"
I said, "What?"
He says, "I just picked up two packages of yours from the office. They are from the 'Lair of Darkness'!"

...I couldn't stop laughing. Things like that [to steal a phrase], make me giggle.

SPRINT PCS, The BASTARDS! Part 2:***

Wow...I'll be damned....

I was checking my bank account yesterday and noticed that I had two charges for the same amount from the same company. After doing some research I figured out what it was from and was quick to call to see about getting it remedied. It was from online store I had found through Yahoo.

Well, I made the call and got an answering machine so I also sent a follow up email. She responded to me that night with a brief explanation of why it was charged twice and that the second charge would drop off automatically.

This morning I replied to her email telling her that I was just shell shocked from companies trying to steal my money in exchange for nothing. I also gave her a VERY brief synopsis of my problem with Sprint PCS and warned against working with this HORRIBLE company.

I checked my email just now. She sent me a reply to that. It seems Sprint PCS is busy trying to screw her out of money too! Gee, it IS a small world after all....!

***For those who haven't already heard this story. Click the title of this post and go to the June 18th entry.

I am SERIOUSLY thinking of mounting a sign on my desk that says, "Please do not
use desk as a percussion instrument."

If one more person taps my desk with their fingernails as they pass, I don't know what
I am going to do to them, but hopefully, I won't get into too much trouble for it.

I've been meaning to make an update but haven't been able to find the time or
inclination...

But, at least today's update will be somewhat interesting!

As those of you who work with me know, when my boss doesn't answer her phone
it rings to my phone. So, last week, I picked up the phone and answered "[Name
Deleted]'s office, [Gr8Goddess] speaking."

The voice on the phone was like a cross between Peter Lorre's voice when he's
playing Igor and that of a Gremlin's. It said: "Lemme talk to [Name Deleted]."

The dialogue continued as follows:

Moi: "I think she has someone in her office at the moment, but I can check to
see. May I ask who's calling?"
Weird Voice: "Sssstehchy"
Moi: "Excuse me? Did you say 'Stitchy'?"
Weird Voice: "SCRATCHY!"
Moi: "Scratchy?:
Scratchy: "Yeah. Lemme talk to [Name Deleted]"
Moi: "Ok, uh, Scratchy, let me see if she's available. Just a moment..."

At this point, I look and [Name Deleted]'s door is closed and that usually
means she has someone in her office or she is on a conference call.

I pick up the phone again:

Moi: "I'm sorry, but it appears she's in a meeting. Can I take a message?"
Silence
Moi: "Hello?"

At this point, I put down the phone, and walk over to one of my coworkers'
desks as I have been pranked by this guy before. He's not on the phone.
He looks at me funny for walking over and peering into his work space. He
follows me to my desk. By the time I get back, the line is dead. I go back to
work after telling him what just happened.

Two minutes later:

The phone rings. I answer:

"[Name Deleted]'s office, [Gr8Goddess] speaking."
Scratchy: "It's Scratchy. Lemme talk to [Name Deleted]."
Moi: "I'm sorry, but she's in a meeting. Can I take a message?"
Scratchy: "Yeah, tell her I want my money before five!"
Moi: "Uh, ok.....Anything else?"

The line goes dead again. This time during the conversation, my coworker
was listening to the earpiece with me.

For the next two hours, I am DYING with curiousity and [Name Deleted]'s
door remains closed.

When she finally comes out, I tell her I got a REALLY weird call meant for
her from someone with a weird, scratchy voice claiming their name was
Scratchy and they had left a message for her indicating that she should get
their money to them before five. The whole time I am explaining this, she's got
this plastic smile on her face (which is the norm). When I finish telling her what
happened, her response to me is:

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about it."

AND THEN SHE JUST WALKS OFF!

DAMN IT! I wanna know what's going on!!!!!

Is she in with the Mob? She havin' trouble with her bookie!? I wanna know!